I am thinking I want to blog more. Basically, I am annoyed with Facebook and I have been horrible at keeping up on baby books... I haven't even printed the boy's pictures off since 3 mo. If it wasn't for my sister, Betsy, we would have NO recent pictures of the boys. Nor would family members. Thanks, Bets. You would think that she has it easier than me, so she can print off more pictures. Not exactly true. She has a 3 year old boy, 2 year old boy and a 5 week old baby girl. Yeah, she has way more time than me! ;)
Fall classes started for me yesterday. I actually did homework last night, so I am off to a good start. I hate when I am in school though... I look around the house like I have so much to do... and I end up doing nothing. I never really used to procrastinate, and I don't actually. I just know that it is pointless to scrub the floor weekly, when the boys are just going to drop their sippy cups off the high chair trays in 30 minutes. Our house is clean, but not spotless.
I remember reading when I was pregnant that it isn't good to have EVERYTHING germ free. Kids actually get sick more. This recent thing with Maxy's finger has really had me wondering. Am I too clean? Am I not clean enough? Do I let them eat more dirt? Less dirt? I had a little break down with the pediatrician about this. I was feeling so bad about myself and my parenting/housekeeping/motherhood skills. He reassured me that it was normal to have these kinds of bugs on your fingers. That poor Maxy just had bad luck. Yeah, I'd say.
But, I will say that he is getting much better. His finger is healing, but he is using it again. I have been watching that closer, in case I would need to work with him on some PT/OT type things, but he seems to be bouncing back pretty well. That is what I love about kiddos. They bounce back so well.
Momma, not so much. I am still feeling the effects from living in the hospital. Not sleeping, not showering, etc. Dustin & Zachary got some nasty bug when we got home. Also a combination of not sleeping. I am now studying on homeostasis for school. How we need homeostasis for our body and how we respond to stress either leads to wellness or illness.
The boys are so resilient though and so fun. Max has started feeding me his snacks. LOL. He will pick up his cereal and put it in my mouth, like a thank you. And Zachary, well, that kid! He will snuggle in, kiss my cheek, act like he is watching TV or something and then, take my glasses off my face! I love watching them grow into little gentlemen.
I think we are going to attempt to play outside today. We haven't really been doing much of that. It is too hard when they run in opposite directions and our swing set was really damaged in the last storm. Not to mention that the sand box has about 6" of rain water in it. It stormed while Maxy was admitted, so I guess that makes sense on the lack of maintenance.
Well, enough procrastinating and back to reality. Aka: dishes, laundry and vacuuming during naptime.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Home with a bandaged finger
We finally came home late Thursday night, about 8 p.m. He was supposed to have surgery on Thurs. to debride the wound. They were going to lance his finger in the OR and clean up the owie. He was still having more pus and whatnot gooing out of that finger. He couldn't eat or drink... and they wanted him to wait on pain meds. We went down to the OR and had to wait for the surgeon for over an hour. When he got there, Maxy was beyond fed up (not to mention hungry, thirsty and in pain!) The surgeon squeezed his poor little finger, decided he didn't want to do surgery and told us to go home.
Max had just been poked twice to get an IV, and we were supposed to meet with another surgeon in the a.m. to decide if he wanted to debride it. I didn't want them to have to do another IV, so we went home... with the IV in his foot.
We basically had to stay in the hospital so long for Vancomycin, a really strong IV antibiotic, until the doctors had the labs back, so they would know exactly what oral antibiotic to send him home on. Until then, he needed to be treated with the Vanco.
The cultures came back late Thursday night. He had staph (not MRSA--the one that is resistant to antibiotics) and strep in his finger. Both germs are very common and everywhere. They are naturally on our skin. Little Max probably ended up with a hangnail that got infected.
He is doing better at home. We are cleaning it and wrapping it. He is on Keflex for 10 days. He finally pooped (he was constipated for 3 days in there!!) and is all full of smile. I ended up with a cold in there. Dustin & Zach have some kind of nasty bug too.
We are supposed to go to Brinley's baptism tomorrow. Hopefully after another night's sleep, we will be ready to be around other people!
Thank you so much for the thoughts and prayers. It was very scary, but we are so glad to be home again.
Loev, Sara
Max had just been poked twice to get an IV, and we were supposed to meet with another surgeon in the a.m. to decide if he wanted to debride it. I didn't want them to have to do another IV, so we went home... with the IV in his foot.
We basically had to stay in the hospital so long for Vancomycin, a really strong IV antibiotic, until the doctors had the labs back, so they would know exactly what oral antibiotic to send him home on. Until then, he needed to be treated with the Vanco.
The cultures came back late Thursday night. He had staph (not MRSA--the one that is resistant to antibiotics) and strep in his finger. Both germs are very common and everywhere. They are naturally on our skin. Little Max probably ended up with a hangnail that got infected.
He is doing better at home. We are cleaning it and wrapping it. He is on Keflex for 10 days. He finally pooped (he was constipated for 3 days in there!!) and is all full of smile. I ended up with a cold in there. Dustin & Zach have some kind of nasty bug too.
We are supposed to go to Brinley's baptism tomorrow. Hopefully after another night's sleep, we will be ready to be around other people!
Thank you so much for the thoughts and prayers. It was very scary, but we are so glad to be home again.
Loev, Sara
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
our 1st hospitalization
Just wanted to send a little update on our Maxy.
Last Thursday, he was up a lot during the night, had a fever, but had got better when he laid down in his crib. He had a fever during the night, up to 103.3, but he is getting 8 (!) teeth and we weren't really positive on the reasoning. His behavior was a little sluggish, but all in all, he was ok.
On Friday, he woke up and while I was changing his diaper, he put his hand up and on his left ring finger, he had a huge blister. It looked the size of a grape and was full of thick, green pus. He still had a fever, and was miserable. He didn't injure it, that we knew of, and we literally had NO idea what was going on.
I found a babysitter for Zach, and tried to take Max into the urgent care. They wouldn't look at him with a fever that high. We tried to get into the regular clinic (all in Princeton) and they were full. The triage nurse finally brought him to the ER, after he screamed in the waiting room for over 40 minutes. Dustin's mom, Nancy came up to take care of Zach and were were going to try to find out what was going on with Maxy.
When we walked into the ER, his fever was 105.6. They checked it later and it was going down, to 104.2. The doctor was sure he had strep throat from daycare (... Max doesn't go to daycare!!) The ER doc had no idea why his fever was so high, but since he did have staph infection in his right hand in December, she decided to put him on Septra and send us home.
He had an ok weekend. He still had a very high fever, but it would come down with Tylenol and Ibuprofen. We were draining his finger every morning, so he could use it... we were soaking it, etc. He wasn't using it and refused to really play.
On Monday morning, Mom was planning on coming anyway, she got there and now his finger was turning black, smelled of rotting flesh and he had a red streak going up his hand. I called our regular doctor, who was booked, but offered to see him anyway during lunch. Mom stayed with Zach and we ran down to Elk River. Max didn't have a fever, but he did have a NASTY infection. The doctor admitted us right from the clinic to the Princeton hospital. They started him on IV Vancomycin every six hours and an oral antibiotics.
It looks like we will be here again tonight. They are thinking that it may be some kind of Strep got in his finger, not Staph. (Staph will not send a red streak up the arm.) Zach is at mom & dad's and loving it. (The kitchen cupboards don't have safety locks on them! Imagine the fun!) Just wanted to let you know what is going on with our little boy and his poor finger.
Dustin is here with me today. My little client is back in the hospital, so I wouldn't be working anyway. Nancy, Dustin's mom came up last night and Mom or Betsy is going to bring Zach up here today. Emma is planning a visit too.
Last Thursday, he was up a lot during the night, had a fever, but had got better when he laid down in his crib. He had a fever during the night, up to 103.3, but he is getting 8 (!) teeth and we weren't really positive on the reasoning. His behavior was a little sluggish, but all in all, he was ok.
On Friday, he woke up and while I was changing his diaper, he put his hand up and on his left ring finger, he had a huge blister. It looked the size of a grape and was full of thick, green pus. He still had a fever, and was miserable. He didn't injure it, that we knew of, and we literally had NO idea what was going on.
I found a babysitter for Zach, and tried to take Max into the urgent care. They wouldn't look at him with a fever that high. We tried to get into the regular clinic (all in Princeton) and they were full. The triage nurse finally brought him to the ER, after he screamed in the waiting room for over 40 minutes. Dustin's mom, Nancy came up to take care of Zach and were were going to try to find out what was going on with Maxy.
When we walked into the ER, his fever was 105.6. They checked it later and it was going down, to 104.2. The doctor was sure he had strep throat from daycare (... Max doesn't go to daycare!!) The ER doc had no idea why his fever was so high, but since he did have staph infection in his right hand in December, she decided to put him on Septra and send us home.
He had an ok weekend. He still had a very high fever, but it would come down with Tylenol and Ibuprofen. We were draining his finger every morning, so he could use it... we were soaking it, etc. He wasn't using it and refused to really play.
On Monday morning, Mom was planning on coming anyway, she got there and now his finger was turning black, smelled of rotting flesh and he had a red streak going up his hand. I called our regular doctor, who was booked, but offered to see him anyway during lunch. Mom stayed with Zach and we ran down to Elk River. Max didn't have a fever, but he did have a NASTY infection. The doctor admitted us right from the clinic to the Princeton hospital. They started him on IV Vancomycin every six hours and an oral antibiotics.
It looks like we will be here again tonight. They are thinking that it may be some kind of Strep got in his finger, not Staph. (Staph will not send a red streak up the arm.) Zach is at mom & dad's and loving it. (The kitchen cupboards don't have safety locks on them! Imagine the fun!) Just wanted to let you know what is going on with our little boy and his poor finger.
Dustin is here with me today. My little client is back in the hospital, so I wouldn't be working anyway. Nancy, Dustin's mom came up last night and Mom or Betsy is going to bring Zach up here today. Emma is planning a visit too.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Birth Story, One Year Later.
I was still going to school, despite bed rest. I had a big presentation in lab that I was working on with a partner. My partner on the project was a crazy procrastinator and since I was 35 weeks pregnant, I had wanted to wrap up the work as soon as possible. I had written the paper and did the majority of the work and she needed to add a table of our data. When she shows it to me, RIGHT before lab, there is no data table. Nope. The one part that was her responsibility, not completed. I stressed to say the least. I didn't really feel that great anyway, but standing in front of my lab class, huge, missing this piece... wasn't a good combination. I made it through and came home.
I was starving, it was Cinco de Mayo and I wanted beer and tacos. I obviously couldn't have beer, and for some reason, we didn't get tacos. We went to Merlin's in Princeton. I had a hamburger with fried onions and chocolate milk. We got home and watched some TV. I started vomiting about 9 p.m. and just did not feel good. I took my Procardia at 10 p.m. and went to sleep on the chair downstairs. Dustin went up to bed.
I think I slept a little, in and out anyway. I woke up often to pee and usually ended up vomiting. I took my Procardia again at 2 a.m. and remember saying goodbye to Dustin when he left for work at 7 a.m.
I woke up around 8 a.m. and called my mom. I had sent my sisters a picture of my swollen feet on their cell phones, and they showed mom. I had a horrible headache and my vision was starting to blur. I really thought I was fine. I hung up from mom, went upstairs to get a bowl of pineapple, forgot to take my Procardia at 10 a.m. Around 10:15 a.m., my sister Betsy called, she was on her way from work to take me into the hospital. I thought that it was ridiculous for her to take off work, so I decided to call up to labor and delivery first.
Nurse Jodi answered the phone. I went through the whole scenario, I am a patient of Dr. Roberts, 35 weeks pregnant with twins, have been vomiting pretty consistently for the last 12 hours, bad headache, blurred vision--and she stopped me immediately. She asked me how far away I lived, I told her about 10 minutes, she said she wanted to see me in 15. I don't even think she caught my name.
I called Betsy back and told her I needed to go up to Labor & Delivery. She was all ready 1/2 way between Milaca and Princeton. My mom had talked to her also. Mom had a cousin who lost full-term twin boys to pre-ecclampsia and I was showing all the signs. They were scared.
I took a shower, but didn't put on any makeup. When Betsy came, she made the comment that I was wearing the same green shirt that she wore when she went into the hospital to deliver her son, Ethan. We went up to the hospital, and when I went to check in, the registration lady told me she was expecting me. Obviously, Jodi had all the alarms sounded. Betsy wanted me to use a wheelchair and I refused. I waddled upstairs and Jodi had all ready been talking to Dr. Roberts. I had an appointment scheduled to see her that afternoon, and Dr. Roberts said that I could come in early and she would check me out in clinic.
That had sounded pretty good to me. But not Betsy. She asked Jodi to take my blood pressure first. Then, look at my feet. My BP was 120/90. My feet were "pretty swollen" and Jodi left to call Dr. Roberts back. She came in the room again and told me that I was going to be admitted to triage. Yippee. Another day sitting in the triage room. I had just been up there one week earlier.
I switched into my gown, peed in a cup, told Dustin what was going on, got comfy. Jodi started an IV, lab came up to draw blood. I was a little dehydrated, but they didn't want me to eat or drink anything. It was around noon now. My BP had settled down, but I was having contractions, every 4 minutes or so. The boys' heartbeats were all over the place too. I tried to relax, but Betsy was nuts. She was so excited, she was making all of us insane.
Around 2 p.m., Jodi came in and told me that I could have the babies that day. I had protein in my urine, a horrid pain in my side, my headache & blurred vision were getting worse, not better. So I needed to get Dustin there. Dr. Roberts had made some calls to the U, because I was still early and showing signs of pre-ecclampsia and HELLP syndrome. My blood work had came back with low platelets. I all ready have trouble clotting. I could bleed out. Yippee.
Dustin got to the hospital & Betsy left. She went to our house first and grabbed the hospital bags, camera, etc. She was going to come back later that night with my parents, and other sister, Emma. We had just bought a 1/4 of beef, and they were going to bring that up. The next few hours were a blur...
A nurse came in and checked my cervix. I was dilated to a 2. I had an ultrasound to check babies position. One week earlier, Zach was head down, baby B was breech. This ultrasound showed both head down. I have no idea when Max flipped. I imagine it was sometime during the violent vomiting. Dr. Roberts came in and checked me again. She said with both babies head down, she could give me something to induce the labor, and I would most likely have the boys vaginally by 8 a.m. the next day. She said I could have a C-Section and be holding them by 7 p.m. I didn't know what to do. I knew that vaginally was better for the boys, and I suggested that but I was also in a ridiculous amount of pain and my BP was getting higher and toxemia was getting worse. She scheduled the C-Section.
Earlier she had called down to the U of MN, to see if I could be transferred there for delivery. There were no beds for me, and only one bed for the twins in the NICU. It was decided to have Dr. Roberts deliver in Princeton and if the twins needed, they could either be flown or sent to a NICU via ambulance.
Dr. Roberts told me not to tell anyone about the pineapple that I had earlier ;) and everyone started flooding in. They brought scrubs for Dustin, lab came in, ultrasound, anesthesia, nurses, and nurses. We were watching the news and the weather had gone from foggy, to sunny, cloudy and then, stormy. There were severe weather warnings for Mille Lacs county, with a bad storm in Foley. At 6 p.m., Brian (anesthesiologist) and a nurse brought me back to the OR.
Dustin and I had met Brian earlier. He was the anesthesiologist in on my emergency D & C when we lost Sammie. That day, 1 1/2 years earlier, he took care of me while Dr. Roberts removed the tissue from my body and Sammie. Now, in the OR, they were delivering our twin sons.
I had my spinal, which didn't hurt at all. I bent over and kissed my babies. The phone was ringing like crazy in the OR of people who wanted to get in on the action. I don't remember meeting everyone, but I know that in the OR there were 2 scrub nurses, Dr. Roberts, Dr. Scott, Brian, Dr. Kubika (pediatrician for the twins), nurses for each boy, two surgical techs, Brian, Dustin and three other people standing in the doorway.
I was draped, Dustin came in. When she was starting, I was supposed to tell Brian if I felt like I was going to throw up. At one point, I didn't feel so great. I told him, and his response, "I know." I look over and he is squeezing the IV bag with both hands, and my BP was 40/20. Next thing, Zachary is born.
He didn't cry right away, he had to be suctioned and spanked. I got to see him for a second, and then the doctor was working on him like crazy. I couldn't see what was going on, but one minute later, Maxwell was born. He cried. I could see his "giraffe" perfectly. The first thing they did after wiping him off was gave him his Vitamin K shot, put the Erythromycin in his eyes, checked him over, and gave him to Dustin.
I cried during the whole delivery and pretty much lost it when I saw Max. I told him I was his mommy and kissed him. Dustin took Max to the nursery, and Zachary was whisked away for "a little extra help." Meanwhile, under the blue curtain, I was falling apart. Later, I find out that I had a huge blood clot around my liver, among other things.
I finally went into recovery at 7 p.m., a half hour after the boys were born. My recovery nurse was Brenda, who also cared for me during Sammie's D & C. I don't know exactly what was going on, there was a lot of whispering and I couldn't leave. I kept trying to see if I could go and see the babies, but they just said I wasn't ready.
Dustin was trying to go back and forth. Our parents and my sisters had came up to the hospital. They were watching through the nursery glass. I still hadn't really seen Zachary and at 8:10 p.m., when they wheeled me to my room, Dr. Kubica held him up, for me to see.
I got into my bed, my family came in to see me and say goodbye. I wanted to hold my babies. The nurse brought Max in, Wayne & Nancy came in to see him. Max tried to nurse, and I kept asking for updates on Zach. He was "not adjusting." But no one would tell me what was going on, even after I told them I was a nurse!
At 10:30 p.m., the pediatrician came in and told us that Zach had not made the 4 hour window that they give babies to "recover." He was breathing very, very fast and needed to go to a NICU. We had the choice between St. Cloud and Fairview Southdale in Edina. We chose to stay in the Fairview family, she called the ambulance. I asked if I could hold him, after a little humming and hoing, she brought him in.
I put him on my chest, skin to skin and immediately, his breathing slowed. He pinked up. He calmed, he nursed. He was like "a different baby" according to the nurse. She called the pediatrician, but the NICU team was all ready on their way. We said our "goodbyes." I bawled until I don't think I had any tears left. I was so devastated, but mostly for the boys. It was my worst nightmare to have the twins separated.
I wanted the twins in the same crib until the ambulance came, around 1:30 a.m., they came in with a ton of paperwork. There were two people with the ambulance, a RN from the NICU and a nurse practitioner from the NICU. They brought Zach in his isolette, with a nuk! and took him to Edina.
Dustin couldn't go with in the ambulance. They suggested that he go home and sleep. It was going to be at least 4:30 a.m. by the time he would be able to see Zach anyway. He went home. Max went to the nursery and I went to sleep...
(to be continued...)
I was starving, it was Cinco de Mayo and I wanted beer and tacos. I obviously couldn't have beer, and for some reason, we didn't get tacos. We went to Merlin's in Princeton. I had a hamburger with fried onions and chocolate milk. We got home and watched some TV. I started vomiting about 9 p.m. and just did not feel good. I took my Procardia at 10 p.m. and went to sleep on the chair downstairs. Dustin went up to bed.
I think I slept a little, in and out anyway. I woke up often to pee and usually ended up vomiting. I took my Procardia again at 2 a.m. and remember saying goodbye to Dustin when he left for work at 7 a.m.
I woke up around 8 a.m. and called my mom. I had sent my sisters a picture of my swollen feet on their cell phones, and they showed mom. I had a horrible headache and my vision was starting to blur. I really thought I was fine. I hung up from mom, went upstairs to get a bowl of pineapple, forgot to take my Procardia at 10 a.m. Around 10:15 a.m., my sister Betsy called, she was on her way from work to take me into the hospital. I thought that it was ridiculous for her to take off work, so I decided to call up to labor and delivery first.
Nurse Jodi answered the phone. I went through the whole scenario, I am a patient of Dr. Roberts, 35 weeks pregnant with twins, have been vomiting pretty consistently for the last 12 hours, bad headache, blurred vision--and she stopped me immediately. She asked me how far away I lived, I told her about 10 minutes, she said she wanted to see me in 15. I don't even think she caught my name.
I called Betsy back and told her I needed to go up to Labor & Delivery. She was all ready 1/2 way between Milaca and Princeton. My mom had talked to her also. Mom had a cousin who lost full-term twin boys to pre-ecclampsia and I was showing all the signs. They were scared.
I took a shower, but didn't put on any makeup. When Betsy came, she made the comment that I was wearing the same green shirt that she wore when she went into the hospital to deliver her son, Ethan. We went up to the hospital, and when I went to check in, the registration lady told me she was expecting me. Obviously, Jodi had all the alarms sounded. Betsy wanted me to use a wheelchair and I refused. I waddled upstairs and Jodi had all ready been talking to Dr. Roberts. I had an appointment scheduled to see her that afternoon, and Dr. Roberts said that I could come in early and she would check me out in clinic.
That had sounded pretty good to me. But not Betsy. She asked Jodi to take my blood pressure first. Then, look at my feet. My BP was 120/90. My feet were "pretty swollen" and Jodi left to call Dr. Roberts back. She came in the room again and told me that I was going to be admitted to triage. Yippee. Another day sitting in the triage room. I had just been up there one week earlier.
I switched into my gown, peed in a cup, told Dustin what was going on, got comfy. Jodi started an IV, lab came up to draw blood. I was a little dehydrated, but they didn't want me to eat or drink anything. It was around noon now. My BP had settled down, but I was having contractions, every 4 minutes or so. The boys' heartbeats were all over the place too. I tried to relax, but Betsy was nuts. She was so excited, she was making all of us insane.
Around 2 p.m., Jodi came in and told me that I could have the babies that day. I had protein in my urine, a horrid pain in my side, my headache & blurred vision were getting worse, not better. So I needed to get Dustin there. Dr. Roberts had made some calls to the U, because I was still early and showing signs of pre-ecclampsia and HELLP syndrome. My blood work had came back with low platelets. I all ready have trouble clotting. I could bleed out. Yippee.
Dustin got to the hospital & Betsy left. She went to our house first and grabbed the hospital bags, camera, etc. She was going to come back later that night with my parents, and other sister, Emma. We had just bought a 1/4 of beef, and they were going to bring that up. The next few hours were a blur...
A nurse came in and checked my cervix. I was dilated to a 2. I had an ultrasound to check babies position. One week earlier, Zach was head down, baby B was breech. This ultrasound showed both head down. I have no idea when Max flipped. I imagine it was sometime during the violent vomiting. Dr. Roberts came in and checked me again. She said with both babies head down, she could give me something to induce the labor, and I would most likely have the boys vaginally by 8 a.m. the next day. She said I could have a C-Section and be holding them by 7 p.m. I didn't know what to do. I knew that vaginally was better for the boys, and I suggested that but I was also in a ridiculous amount of pain and my BP was getting higher and toxemia was getting worse. She scheduled the C-Section.
Earlier she had called down to the U of MN, to see if I could be transferred there for delivery. There were no beds for me, and only one bed for the twins in the NICU. It was decided to have Dr. Roberts deliver in Princeton and if the twins needed, they could either be flown or sent to a NICU via ambulance.
Dr. Roberts told me not to tell anyone about the pineapple that I had earlier ;) and everyone started flooding in. They brought scrubs for Dustin, lab came in, ultrasound, anesthesia, nurses, and nurses. We were watching the news and the weather had gone from foggy, to sunny, cloudy and then, stormy. There were severe weather warnings for Mille Lacs county, with a bad storm in Foley. At 6 p.m., Brian (anesthesiologist) and a nurse brought me back to the OR.
Dustin and I had met Brian earlier. He was the anesthesiologist in on my emergency D & C when we lost Sammie. That day, 1 1/2 years earlier, he took care of me while Dr. Roberts removed the tissue from my body and Sammie. Now, in the OR, they were delivering our twin sons.
I had my spinal, which didn't hurt at all. I bent over and kissed my babies. The phone was ringing like crazy in the OR of people who wanted to get in on the action. I don't remember meeting everyone, but I know that in the OR there were 2 scrub nurses, Dr. Roberts, Dr. Scott, Brian, Dr. Kubika (pediatrician for the twins), nurses for each boy, two surgical techs, Brian, Dustin and three other people standing in the doorway.
I was draped, Dustin came in. When she was starting, I was supposed to tell Brian if I felt like I was going to throw up. At one point, I didn't feel so great. I told him, and his response, "I know." I look over and he is squeezing the IV bag with both hands, and my BP was 40/20. Next thing, Zachary is born.
He didn't cry right away, he had to be suctioned and spanked. I got to see him for a second, and then the doctor was working on him like crazy. I couldn't see what was going on, but one minute later, Maxwell was born. He cried. I could see his "giraffe" perfectly. The first thing they did after wiping him off was gave him his Vitamin K shot, put the Erythromycin in his eyes, checked him over, and gave him to Dustin.
I cried during the whole delivery and pretty much lost it when I saw Max. I told him I was his mommy and kissed him. Dustin took Max to the nursery, and Zachary was whisked away for "a little extra help." Meanwhile, under the blue curtain, I was falling apart. Later, I find out that I had a huge blood clot around my liver, among other things.
I finally went into recovery at 7 p.m., a half hour after the boys were born. My recovery nurse was Brenda, who also cared for me during Sammie's D & C. I don't know exactly what was going on, there was a lot of whispering and I couldn't leave. I kept trying to see if I could go and see the babies, but they just said I wasn't ready.
Dustin was trying to go back and forth. Our parents and my sisters had came up to the hospital. They were watching through the nursery glass. I still hadn't really seen Zachary and at 8:10 p.m., when they wheeled me to my room, Dr. Kubica held him up, for me to see.
I got into my bed, my family came in to see me and say goodbye. I wanted to hold my babies. The nurse brought Max in, Wayne & Nancy came in to see him. Max tried to nurse, and I kept asking for updates on Zach. He was "not adjusting." But no one would tell me what was going on, even after I told them I was a nurse!
At 10:30 p.m., the pediatrician came in and told us that Zach had not made the 4 hour window that they give babies to "recover." He was breathing very, very fast and needed to go to a NICU. We had the choice between St. Cloud and Fairview Southdale in Edina. We chose to stay in the Fairview family, she called the ambulance. I asked if I could hold him, after a little humming and hoing, she brought him in.
I put him on my chest, skin to skin and immediately, his breathing slowed. He pinked up. He calmed, he nursed. He was like "a different baby" according to the nurse. She called the pediatrician, but the NICU team was all ready on their way. We said our "goodbyes." I bawled until I don't think I had any tears left. I was so devastated, but mostly for the boys. It was my worst nightmare to have the twins separated.
I wanted the twins in the same crib until the ambulance came, around 1:30 a.m., they came in with a ton of paperwork. There were two people with the ambulance, a RN from the NICU and a nurse practitioner from the NICU. They brought Zach in his isolette, with a nuk! and took him to Edina.
Dustin couldn't go with in the ambulance. They suggested that he go home and sleep. It was going to be at least 4:30 a.m. by the time he would be able to see Zach anyway. He went home. Max went to the nursery and I went to sleep...
(to be continued...)
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Monday, May 3, 2010
A few pictures
The blue bird on the swingset
Zachary, enjoying his birthday card
Maxwell, waiting for his cakeSunday, May 2, 2010
Birthday party
Just a few pictures and lots of thanks for all who made it to the birthday party yesterday. It was so awesome to celebrate with our friends and family. Rachel, Mark, Auntie Betsy, Uncle Rob, Ethan, Owen & baby, Uncle Darrick, Auntie Emily and baby Susan, Grandpa Wayne, Grandma Nancy, Auntie Emma, Aaron, Jocie, Jessica, Grandma Debbie, Papa Marty, Amanda, Arlyn, Alec, Arycin-- THANK YOU!
The boys got so many great things, including these very cool ride on toys. Dustin and I bought them a swing set. And ever since it has been in the backyard, a little bluebird perches itself on there. It isn't spooky, it just sits there, and looks around. Protects the swingset. We have lived here for three years and have never had a bluebird in our yard. I believe in spirits being in animals, and I realize I am going to sound a little out there right now, but every time I look at that bird, I think about our angel baby, Sammie. Looking over her brothers, playing on the swingset too. It literally leaves me speechless.
And that takes a lot.
Love, The Mommy
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